Caption contest 2: Why are they voting "no" to Superboy?
Superboy has been summoned to appear before the Legion. They're all voting NO! But why?
Monday, December 10, 2007
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21 comments:
"I dunno, dawg, it was a little pitchy."
I'm sorry, but we already have a "Batman" and his chest logo much more closely matches his theme.
"Your name needs to be two separate words, as in Super Boy"
"Our constitution says, 'One Unique Power,' and you've got like... fifteen! I'm sorry, but if we don't rigidly adhere to the letter of the law, why, we'd be no better than those Heroes of Lallor."
"Sorry, Superboy, you can't join us until you change your costume into something nearly unrecognizable."
"You're too late, Superboy - you can't join the Legion, you've been retconned out of continuity."
Ha! Dave you crack me up.
"I'm sorry, but your super-name is simply too litigious! Our lawyers have advised us that you cannot join our club until you're twenty years older!"
"Can anyone hear what I'm saying with this bubble over my head?"
or
"Sorry, just got a call from Joanne Siegel and having you on the team is NOT worth listening to her again!"
or the more practical
"You are from 1000 years in the past and are the most pivotal figure in all of history. I know we're teenagers, but we're not so irresponsible to put you in harms way and risk the past 1000 years of history changing. If that happened there would end up being like 5 versions of all of us and nobody would have any clue what our history is!"
"Sorry, but you're not attractive enough. You need to look a little bit more handsome...like that Tom Welling guy"
"Your costume is in violation of Legion Constitution article 17, section 4A: 'No capes!'"
"Thank God I wore this helmet -- your power of super-farts is nauseating Lightning Lad. Plus your skintight shorts are repulsing Saturn Girl. What, you were raised on a farm, Super-redneck?"
"No, Superboy, we DON'T want to see what's in your 'Pocket Universe'"
Sorry, bathroom breaks are scheduled on the hour. Next time, go before the meeting starts.
"Now I, Proty, shall stab Cosmic Boy in the head, thereby advancing the cause of Protean freedom! Antares forever!"
"Legionnaires, vote! Should Superboy keep that stupid spit curl?"
"Grife, this is kewl! When we all press the B button at once, his head spins around. Press your A button, Saturn Girl, and make his arm do that bird thing again."
I'm sorry, but super head-turning just isn't the kind of power we're looking for.
Does anyone know where the walls went?
I'm sorry Superboy but as you can see we only have three chairs so we are forced to reject you for membership.
"Nice try, Time Trapper!"
"Are you looking at my helmet?"
"I know it's pink! I asked for light scarlet, dammit!"
"Excellent! We've got him right in the center of the bullseye."
"No capes! psst, Imra, go put on your disco outfit!"
Howsabout:
We don't care if you ARE from Kansas in the 1950's, those cracks about Element Lad were totally out of order!
(I love Patric C's second suggestion above - so true!)
Or Patrick C's third suggestion, I meant to say...
"That's the worst singing I've heard in AGES!!!"
"Um, no. Sorry Tyg, but this time you *lose* your money."
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